We’ve all been there. You have to give a presentation or speak in front of a group.
The emotions kick in. You feel nervous. Your heart begins beating out of your chest. You fear everybody judging you.
What if there was one simple way to get rid of this fear once and for all? There is…
It all boils down to self-judgement.
Just last night, a student of The Limitless Transformation emailed me saying that one of the reasons he took the program was to help him overcome his fear of public speaking.
Fear is not the right word.
Utilizing a few psychological techniques that are taught in this article, you can quickly overcome your fear of public speaking and feel more calm, balanced, and professional when you get up and talk in front of a group of people.
In order to do this, you need to learn the right way to work through your unwanted emotions.
Step 1 – Visualize the Worst-Case Scenario
Bring up a picture in your mind, seeing yourself in the picture of what the fear is. This way, instead of suppressing the fear and dealing with the overwhelming amount of emotions – take a clear look at it as if it already unfolded.
Get familiar with it.
When you see yourself in the picture and the people around you, take a clear look at yourself.
- What are people judging you for?
Are you unprofessional? Are you a doofus? What specifically strikes the chord with you?
Step 2 – Feel the Emotions
In the end, the nervousness you feel is simply an emotion flowing through your body.
The other month while traveling through the streets of Lima, Peru – this man gets on a bus and is dancing weirdly to Michael Jackson – Thriller in the aisle. He looks ridiculous. People were judging him. But he didn’t care. He was having a good time!
I would have been embarrassed to do that.
Can you see in this case that two different people in the same exact situation have two completely different emotional reactions to the same thing?
I would have felt embarrassed not because of the reactions other people have, but because of my perception and my own internal self-judgement – which is ultimately the trigger of the emotions.
“Regardless of what happens outside of you, or what other people think of you, you are always in control of how you feel on the inside.”Andrew Alexander
One of the biggest things I talk about in The Limitless Transformation is that we are in control of our emotions. While things outside of us might have triggered it, in order to create real and lasting change – it all begins internal. That’s how we make the change we are looking for.
So when you bring up the visual of the worst-case fear unfolding, feel the emotions in your body.
- The thought (the picture) of your fear is the trigger,
- The emotions you feel because of it are the glue, and
- The self-judgement is the roots that hold it in the ground.
Feel the emotions that come up when you see yourself failing at public speaking and your fear comes true.
Pay attention to where the emotions are in your body.
Rate them from 0-10 in intensity.
There is an old Buddhist saying that all suffering comes from resistance. Just the fact that you can stop suppressing all of this pain and bring it to the surface should be enough to start working through things that used to be unconscious problems in the past.
Step 3 – Release the Self-Judgement
On my YouTube Channel, I have a video demonstration of The Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT). This is a rapid emotional release technique that helps release your nervousness and the self-judgement you face.
Now that you have your label of what you’re being judged for:
- I’m not good enough
- I’m a loser
- I’m unprepared
- Whatever it is for you…
Plug that phrase into the sentence, “Even though I ______________, I still deeply and completely love and accept myself.”
Feel the feelings of love and acceptance come from the center of your chest, while doing 3-5 rounds of The Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) at a time.
After you do this, re-analyze your emotions you feel when you look at that picture.
And repeat the process until the nervousness goes away.
Getting the proper expectations – I’ve been a professional coach and NLP Practitioner since 2014. I’ve worked with hundreds of clients and have done thousands of hours of change work on myself. Think of this as hammering away at a large block of ice. You hammer away and a few chunks come off.
While I experienced immediate results with my first session, it really took a mix of continuous work and real-world experience getting in front of people and speaking before the problem went away.
I can now get myself to talk in front of crowds, and in front of tens of thousands of people through online interviews and videos without the nervousness that once held me back in the past.
Anchoring Positive Emotions
While the previous technique shows you how to release a lot of the emotional baggage that makes you feel nervous, there is a second psychological technique that can allow you to access any positive emotion at any time.
The way it works is simple.
Have you ever noticed that a song can bring you back to a specific moment in time, and it brings up the good emotions so you continue to feel it, even when that past memory is gone?
The song is the trigger – and the emotions you feel come up.
Using an NLP Anchoring technique, the following YouTube video will allow you to create an anchor that allows you to bring up positive emotions at any time, with the push of a button.
In general, I set the anchor on the back of a knuckle – so every time every time I press the knuckle, it brings back the feelings of being confident, in the moment, and powerful/relaxed.
But you can choose whatever emotions you would like to feel when you’re public speaking.
Many people who I’ve worked alongside over the years press the palm of their hand on their abdomen while taking in a deep breath. This is a good trigger point if you’re standing up and speaking in front of a crowd.
The important thing is to choose a unique stimulus to be an anchor so it doesn’t get watered down. And it can hold its strength over time.
If you start to get a little nervous, it helps balance it all out.
The process is simple:
- Think of a positive emotion you’d like to feel,
- Go back to a moment in time where you felt this emotion and it was very powerful,
- Start to bring up that emotion in your body right now,
- As the emotion begins to be felt, press your anchor (knuckle or other unique stimulus),
- Hold down for 5-15 seconds, and
- As the emotion is about to peak, let go of the anchor.
Repeat this process multiple times. Then, without visualizing the feeling, simply press the anchor and you’ll notice the emotions will come as soon as you press it.
These two techniques combined are a great start to help any person feel more comfortable while public speaking. If you’d like to really work through this problem once and for all, I’d suggest scheduling a Skype or Phone coaching session to talk with me more about how I can work with you one-on-one to solve this problem once and all for you.
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- Coaching Sessions – If you’d like us to help you overcome your fear of public speaking (or other personal development topics you’re interested in) – book a coaching session here.
- Video Training Program – If you’d like to enroll in the premium Limitless Transformation video training program (and workbook), you can do that here.
Andrew Alexander, Creator of The Limitless Transformation